Tag: #Boys2Men

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ENTERTAINMENT: Watch What You Watch

Dear Son,

Please be mindful of what you put before your eyes and in what you entertain yourself. Everything that matters to you matters to God. In fact, He cares so much about how we have fun and what we do that He gives us instruction on the best things and thoughts to ponder. Our omniscient (all-knowing) Heavenly Father knows the damaging repercussions of disruptive thoughts and destructive entertainment. Even better yet, God tells us of all the benefits of having good thoughts and wholesome entertainment. Guess what – somehow good entertainment always leads to a THANK YOU, JESUS! And that’s worship – which God loves. 

The devil cunningly wraps evil into fun like a hotdog in a bun (like poisonous ingredients in a tasty snack). So, he can lure you to find pleasure in what he has concocted to destroy you. The enemy wants to keep you from the amazingly blessed plans that God has ordained for you. Always remember; everything that the devil has to offer comes with adverse side effects and multi-generational curses. 

But EVERYTHING that God has for you comes with more blessings than you can imagine. Even your children, grandchildren and their children will benefit from those blessings. Just think – your children, grandchildren, great-grandchildren and so on will benefit from you learning, knowing and living out God’s word. Isn’t that AMAZING?!

Philippians 4:8 (CEV) says it all – Finally, my friends, keep your minds on whatever is true, pure, right, holy, friendly, and proper. Don’t ever stop thinking about what is truly worthwhile and worthy of praise. 

Here are some other verses – 

Philippians 4:8  NKJVAmplified Version
Finally, brethren, whatever things are true, whatever things are noble, whatever things are just, whatever things are pure, whatever things are lovely, whatever things are of good report, if there is any virtue and if there is anything praiseworthy—meditate on these things.  Finally, believers, whatever is true, whatever is honorable and worthy of respect, whatever is right and confirmed by God’s word, whatever is pure and wholesome, whatever is lovely and brings peace, whatever is admirable and of good repute; if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think continually on these things [center your mind on them, and implant them in your heart].
Colossians 3:17
And whatever you do in word or deed, do all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through Him.Whatever you do [no matter what it is] in word or deed, do everything in the name of the Lord Jesus [and in dependence on Him], giving thanks to God the Father through Him.
Ephesians 5:11 
And have no fellowship with the unfruitful works of darkness, but rather expose them.Do not participate in the worthless and unproductive deeds of darkness, but instead expose them [by exemplifying personal integrity, moral courage, and godly character];
Titus 2:11-12 
For the grace of God that brings salvation has appeared to all men, 12 teaching us that, denying ungodliness and worldly lusts, we should live soberly, righteously, and godly in the present age,For the [remarkable, undeserved] grace of God that [a]brings salvation has appeared to all men. 12 It teaches us to reject ungodliness and worldly (immoral) desires, and to live sensible, upright, and godly lives [lives with a purpose that reflect spiritual maturity] in this present age,
Matthew 6:24 
“No one can serve two masters; for either he will hate the one and love the other, or else he will be loyal to the one and despise the other. You cannot serve God and mammon.“No one can serve two masters; for either he will hate the one and love the other, or he will be devoted to the one and despise the other. You cannot serve God and mammon [money, possessions, fame, status, or whatever is valued more than the Lord].
Hebrews 10:26 
For if we sin willfully after we have received the knowledge of the truth, there no longer remains a sacrifice for sins,For if we go on willfully and deliberately sinning after receiving the knowledge of the truth, there no longer remains a sacrifice [to atone] for our sins [that is, no further offering to anticipate],
Romans 16:19 
For your obedience has become known to all. Therefore I am glad on your behalf; but I want you to be wise in what is good, and [a]simple concerning evil.For the report of your obedience has reached everyone, so that I rejoice over you, but I want you to be wise in what is good and innocent in what is evil.
1 Corinthians 6:12 
All things are lawful for me, but all things are not helpful. All things are lawful for me, but I will not be brought under the power of any.Everything is permissible for me, but not all things are beneficial. Everything is permissible for me, but I will not be enslaved by anything [and brought under its power, allowing it to control me].
1 Corinthians 10:23 
All things are lawful for me, but not all things are helpful; all things are lawful for me, but not all things edify.All things are lawful [that is, morally legitimate, permissible], but not all things are beneficial or advantageous. All things are lawful, but not all things are constructive [to character] and edifying [to spiritual life].
  
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The Power of PRESENCE

Fatherhood/Manhood – a key component to child rearing. Never underestimate the power of presence. This axiom was typified near the turn of the twenty-first century when young male and adult female elephants from South Africa’s Kruger National Park and Game Reserve were relocated to Pilanesberg National Park while

adult males (bulls) were killed or retained at Kruger, a measure taken to quell Kruger’s burgeoning elephant population. What ensued at Pilanesberg was extremely distressing. Mutilated rhinoceros’ carcasses were found at Pilanesberg, and as time passed the number of violent killings grew. Upon investigation it was discovered that roving bands of the very juvenile male elephants from Kruger were wreaking havoc. These culprits were not only chasing down and killing rhinos, but they were also terrorizing other animals as well. Further examination concluded that the absence of adult male elephants was the destabilizing factor in the young male lives, dramatically disrupting their social behavior and impairing their ability to make appropriate decisions. In their natural hierarchy adult bulls model behaviors and keep the young ones in line. In an effort to curb the crisis, Park Rangers flew in some of the older bulls from Kruger. Within weeks the attacks ceased. The natural world and science have confirmed that the mature male presence is essential to social development. Never underestimate the power of presence.

I would never be as condescending to compare our humanity to any animal.  However, there is a lesson to be extracted from the above. The absence of positive male role models/fathers is generationally debilitating to individuals as well as to society: 70% of persons incarcerated, 80% of rapists, 71% of high school dropouts 63% of teens who commit suicide, all have a common denominator; they come from homes with either absent or abusive fathers. Literally every social ill and every social pathology can be linked to a deficiency in fatherhood.

We currently live in a society in which 2.3 million individuals are incarcerated. The incarceration rate in the U.S. is by far the highest in the world. Mass incarceration trends have adversely and disproportionately impacted our homes; 1 out of every 28 children has an incarcerated parent. That number becomes 1 in 8 when applied to the African American child. In the U.S., 40% of children are born to single parent households; that is 76% when speaking of black households. Manhood, men, fathers are absent, incarcerated, ineffective, uninformed, misguided, miseducated, misled, preoccupied. The consequence: Generations of suffering, misguided, and maladjusted children.

The impact and absence of a father, a man, in the lives of youth can never be underestimated. Fathers model roles, establish order, and exhibit the methodologies of manhood to their children. The reappearance and reintegration of fathers into our homes and communities would (over time) reverse societal ills caused by their absence and redeem the family – the root of society. A positive role model in a young man’s life greatly improves his chances of success later in life. Never underestimate the power of presence.

#FreddieWilliams, #Man-U-ScriptBook

Excerpt from the book Man_U-Script: the ethos of manhood, available on Amazon.com

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Dear Brother,

Photo by RF._.studio from Pexels

What does a mother do when she learns that her little boy has been exposed to p0rn0graphy? What does she do when she realizes that her elementary school age son has gone further than exposure, but he has actually been watching p0rn?What is she to do, especially when she knows the dark road that p0rn can lead a man down?

Outside of confiscating his device(s), what should a mother do. How does a mother train up a child in the way that he is supposed to go?

Your sisters need to hear from you. Please, please advise!

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I’m going to be a man one day

Poem by Malachi with mommy’s help

I’m going to be a man one day
How do they think and what do they say?
I’m going to be a man one day
Does a man even get to play?
What do they do?
Hey man! I’m going to be like you!
What does a man do when he’s mad?
And can he cry when he’s sad?

Do you ever eat snacks like chips or something?
Or do you always eat vegetables?
Are all men good at sports?
Will I be tall or will I be short?
Do all men like music?
And what do men do when they get sick?
Do they go to the hospital or do they stay home and eat soup?
Do they wear shorts or do they wear suits?

I’m going to be a man one day
I’m going to be strong like my uncles
Funny like Uncle Owen and Uncle Rob
Smart like Uncle Owen, Uncle Alva, Uncle Allen, Uncle James, Uncle Aaron, and Papa
Rich like the HipHopPreacher Eric Thomas
Godly like my friend Mr. Shofar
Loving like all of my uncles
And happy like me.

I’m going to be a man one day
And that’s what I want to be.

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Give it some thought.

By Owen Williams
There is nothing new that has not been said before. So what can I say that is useful to a father or just any black man in this world as we have come to know it?

Photo by Mídia from Pexels

Here’s a bit of wisdom that would have been helpful to me earlier in life:
When we decide to play a game of basketball, football, tennis or any other game, we rarely expect it to be easy. In fact, we expect to be challenged, and we do not expect the rules to change during the game. However, life is different from other challenging experiences and any other game, in that the rules can change in an instant.

My primary goal here is to be brief. So my quick advice: Identify and list the qualities that you think embody the type of human being that you would look up to for guidance. Find the closest available mentor who exemplifies those values, and then go about slowly, if necessary, making adjustments in your everyday life that will move you towards being that kind of human being.

Secondly, appreciate that women are uniquely different from men in many ways. But know that in the more fundamental ways women are like us men. They simply require a different operating manual. They deserve love, friendship, understanding, and distance (when necessary, to cool the GIS off). All the stuff we give to our Male counterparts with ease, they too deserve. Thirdly, they are better than men. The great ones will change your life forever. Try, as soon as you can, to manage your appetites.

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